Monday, September 10, 2018

A Two-Week Hiatus.


The start of the school year has been a rough one for us.

Nothing terrible has happened (well, relatively...though our cat is very sick). It's just that, sliding into a new normal is tricky for me every year, and after being on a crusade to slow down and step back since our round with the flu this past February, I feel particularly icky about it.

I've already stepped down from some of my jobs, and I thought that just skimming something from the top would help me juggle what's left. Truthfully though, it hasn't been enough.

My real problem lies in constantly being available. My job with Matilda Jane requires me to be around pretty much 24/7, and while it's a harmless thing, I get asked questions at all times of the day, when I'm doing any number of things. I try to limit myself to how often I check in or how quickly I jump to tackle something, but there's no good separation from my job. It exists online, and in my house, and at all hours of the day (with releases happening at midnight and 3am) through devises that I'm turning to constantly - over and over again. And I want to be good to my customers - answering their questions quickly, sharing info as soon as I'm allowed, entering their orders and helping them with fit and styling. But at the cost of having no space that is uniquely mine.

My phone updated recently, and the new software makes my phone unable to hold a charge. I've been charging it anywhere from 5-7 times a day, and that has made me pay a lot of attention to why it's draining so quickly. (I mean, it's the phone's problem for sure, but if I wasn't using it, then it wouldn't have anything to drain.)

My 4th grader now has a violin to practice every night, and reading and math practice, spelling and math homework - his workload has officially become legit. I have to drive my preschooler back and fourth 3 days a week now (as opposed to 2 like last year), and while my 2nd grader has always been a bit ahead of the curve academically, I have to help him nightly, too, so he can hang onto that. We've been tackling home repairs and organizational projects constantly to try and get our home ready to sell. These project always take longer and cost more than expected. Matt's traveling again soon. And one of our cats had a stroke and has been given a grim prognosis.

In the mean time, I've lost the time to blog and read and create the way I'd like to - the way that makes me happy. Instead they feel like stressors to add to a sprawling adulty to do list. And while I try to wade my way through this, I so desperately want to shut out the noise from the outside world.

I know that I can't do this completely, so I'm only doing it for 2 weeks.

I won't be blogging, I won't be reading your blogs (not because I don't love you!), I won't be hanging out on social media, and I won't be chatting on messenger. I'll be deleting messenger on my phone, and moving all of my social media apps into a folder that won't get touched. (I'd delete them, but I don't know my passwords so I don't want that headache in 2 weeks lol.) I'll be turning off app badges and most notifications. I'll be doing even more yoga than normal, I'll be attempting to meditate every day, and I'll be turning to books and crafts in my down time.

Meanwhile, I will be checking my email once...maybe twice a day. Email is not demanding in the same way everything else is, and it has that hygge feel to it of slowing down to hand-craft something, like electronic snail mail. If you need me or you'd like to say hello, that's the place to do it. Jenn @ :)

Until September 25th!

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