Monday, May 23, 2016


I'm going to go ahead and start this off with a big fat apology to the LuLaRoe lovers of the world. I know that this can get intense and emotional (as most shopping addictions do.) But I first want to tell you that I adore both shopping as much as you do, AND the feel of these leggings because my gosh....where has this fabric been all my life?

Hopefully you can see that I'm not trying to be a hater, here, and rather I'm just sort of stepping back from the fury for a sec to say.......ummmmmm, what?

Because for real - some of these patterns make me question a LuLaLover's sanity.

I feel like if we'd see mu-mu cut shirts with patterns of ugly colored horses on a rack at Target we'd all be like....da faq, Target? (With our shocked emoji faces on.) And instead, because they come with a rainbow square label and bitches will cut you just to post their PayPal email first, everyone eats it up.

So I just wanna say........WHAT IS GOING ON?!

Since when did we start going bonkers over Doritos dresses? Tell me, please - other than a launch party for a new Doritos flavor (and I can't even imagine how you'd get an invite to that), where would you be going that warrants adorning this dress? The chip aisle at the grocery store? A cosplay convention for The Flintsones?

I suppose you can argue that the patterns they use makes it so there's something for literally everyone. Like....

Are you into both the Illuminati and Hunting? There's leggings for that.

Or have you ever visited a Frank Lloyd Wright house and thought, damn it, I wish I could wear those windows on my legs? Boom.

Or, or.....for the fans of demonic Chihuahuas? You can now live in comfort as you tell the world about your creepy fetish.

There's even a shirt that doubles as self defense! You can hide this puppy under a sweater and if someone comes at you, flash them your shirt - insta-seizure. They'll be rendered useless.

To me, though? These patterns look like something on a clearance rack that you don't even want to part with $3 over. I truly love the solids and the florals that LuLaRoe pumps out, but these weird patterns that seem to make up the bulk of every seller's inventory are really confusing to me.

I don't know about you, but I don't want to fast track my way to looking like I've succumbed to dressing from the clothing section of Walmart, but paid a more boutique price for it. 

So where is all this rage coming from?!

There are legit adorable pieces to be had. I know, because I've gotten them. Like these three pair of leggings that I am obsessed with and rotate around constantly (ps, I need a pair of dark grey OS and will always be ready to pounce on an adorable floral if I cross paths with it.)

So tell me, LuLaObsessives - WHAT is the deal, here?

When did wearing soul-stealing Chihuahuas as a second skin on your legs become worth $25?
(Or $80, if you're ebay-ing your unicorn?)


  1. Lol!! I don't get the leggings crazy and thankfully live in Panama far away from it. We have our own crazy leggings that are only $3. Got here from reading the article on Quartz. But ended up crying laughing! Thanks!

  2. hahahahaha THANK YOU! omg. I have never touched a pair of LLR leggings...I really hate MLM...but mostly I am like, what in the world? I kind of believe patterns don't belong on legs, period--but there are patterns and then there are FUGLY patterns--your commentary here has me LOL for real.

  3. Just heard about LLR today via Quartz. Holy hell, das some fugly shizz!!!

  4. I find the patterns you showed us very disturbing. That is severe motion sickness disturbing. If I saw these things moving about on a person, I would definitely have to go into the nearest restroom and hurl.

    I didn't know that is a thing - clothes that cause vomiting. If I need to puke I will use the old-fashioned method of sticking a finger down my throat. No need to purchase a $65 emetic.

  5. I saw this because of link in the article on Quartz. I still cannot believe that such things as 'mlm-reloaded' occur. And these patterns... Can't be!

  6. Your description of these LLR creations had me crying with laughter. Thank you!
    Some of their leggings are cute and would make great PJs, but wouldn't flatter the vast majority of women.