Friday, May 9, 2014

Growing Pains

Our house is so chaotic at the moment - possibly the most chaotic it's ever been. Some days (uh, like today), it feels incredibly overwhelming. Other days, it's sort of thrilling. And many of those days, simultaneously, it hurts. In the most wonderful, bittersweet way.

While Jake is working on a couple of teeth, and that's no doubt uncomfortable, the majority of the pain in all of this growing is found in my mama heart. In this season of change and growth, I'm hurting in a beautiful way. I've never been a fan of change, and I find myself emotionally linked to the way things are and I'm unwilling to see them go! And as you'll see in a moment, a lot of things are changing.

♥ Jake is eating solids, and I'm back to making baby food purees like a one-woman factory. I can hardly believe that I am now two babies removed from when I did this for Luke, and that it may be for the last time (?). So, so bittersweet.

Homemade Sweet Potato Puree
Jake loves sweet potatoes - they're his favorite so far!

♥ Luke graduated from his toddler bed into a full-size loft bed with a twin mattress. He proudly picked out Ninja Turtle sheets and a comforter, and he adores his new set up so much that he often spends time playing up there just because he can. The new organization in his room has created a cozy little nook where he can read books, make forts, and spend time just being a kid.

I'm a little jealous of his little nook! And does he look proud of his new bed or what??

♥ Henry graduated from his crib to Luke's old toddler bed, which looks like a firetruck. We have some difficult moments with him not staying put or going to sleep when he's supposed to, but he's done surprisingly well so far!

♥ The crib moved into Luke's room, and Jake is now taking his naps in there. I am more than happy to keep him in my bed overnight - it's easier for both of us, and keeps our nursing relationship going strong. But during the daylight hours, a lot needs to get done. For the last 6 months, I've let him take his naps in my lap, and I can't justify that anymore. Nor can I trust him to nap safely in my bed without me, so it was time.

♥ The swings went back on the swing set, and Henry moved up to the big boy swings to make room for Jake in the baby swing. I saw the swings fully loaded the other day, with all three of my boys, and I almost cried. I can't believe that they've all grown to this point. And I also had a bittersweet thought pop into mind - "Well, the swing set is full, I guess we're done having kids."

Please excuse our horridly ugly pool - I think we've finally decided to take it down this year!

♥ I've been packaging up our newborn and 0-3 month baby clothes to lend to my sister, who's having a baby boy this summer. As I sort through the itty bitty pieces that my guys wore at their tiniest, I can't help but feel heartbroken knowing they're leaving my house. Of course, I can't expect to keep an entire tiny boy wardrobe forever - they have to go sometime - but I guess my Mama heart isn't ready to see them go. I've also been re-labeling empty bins with sizes that are bigger than I can comprehend to make room for what the big boys are outgrowing. My kids were big enough to fit these things, and now they're too big for them?!

♥ Henry has been going through a bit of a verbal explosion, lately. He was never our verbal kiddo, but suddenly he's trying harder than ever to be understood. I adore his innocently mispronounced language, and his sweet little baby voice. Some of my favorites of his - -

"Yesy Do!" (When he's trying to argue a "yes" point, like - "Don't touch that, Henry!" - "Yesy do!")
"Lee Fletcher" (Way Faster - he says it when he's on the swings, we laugh every time!)
"What do heck?" (What the heck)
"Hey! Hey! Guess what?"
"I winned!" (Whenever he comes out on top in a race, or even if he hasn't - haha!)
"Neek Knock!" (Knock Knock, when he tries to tell a joke...the following joke is usually just as hilarious)
"Tur-Tur-Turtles" (Ninja Turtles)
"Ay-bee-birs" (Angry Birds)

I could keep going, but those are all at the top!

♥ Jake just had his 6 month check up. He's still taller than average, he's just a pinch below 18 pounds (he may even be there by now), about to pop his two bottom teeth, and physically advanced. His doctor commented on his earlier-than-average motor skills, but we already knew! He's seriously days from full-fledged crawling. He's been army crawling for about a month now, and his coordination is ridiculous for his age. I guess even when you're little, if you've got two big kids running around in your line of vision all day, you consider yourself capable as well!

Handsome little loves! <3

Let's not even address the fact that Luke graduates from preschool in less than a month, because I'm not emotionally there, just yet. Sighhhh.

With all we have going on, I feel the most emotional about the physical things - packing up the baby sleepers, reorganizing the bedrooms, seeing the swings loaded up. Maybe it's that they are visual representations of the way my life changes a little every day, but those things have given me such pause.

As things get moved around in their rooms, I find myself feeling very sentimental. Luke's bedroom was the first big project I took on when we moved into this house, and it's making me sad to see it all shifted around. Henry was brought home to this house, and his room with its little Pottery Barn whales was the closest thing I ever got to a full nursery. I spent so, so many of my moments in his first two years in the glider in his room, nursing him and rocking him to sleep. The view I had from that glider is etched into my mind as the place where I sometimes felt the most blessed. And it's silly, but I don't like that the view from the glider is different, now. I only got to see it a handful of times with Jake in my arms before the changes began. And this new season is full of boys who have already begun to grow older and further from being Mommy's little guys. My mama heart just can't take it sometimes!

Of course, there is joy to be had in these moments. I am blessed to have them here, to watch them grow and learn, and those simple facts are not luxuries that everyone gets to have.

I am thankful for the growing pains. ♥

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