Thursday, January 26, 2012

Bitter Hair Cut

Henry definitely inherited my hair gene. I was born with a full, dark, messy mop, and he followed suit. People would come to oogle over the baby and they'd always say, "That hair!" It's always been "his thing". That... and his eyes, and his chubby rolls, and his dimples. And everything else, because he's perfect.


So anyway, the thing about being born with a lot of hair is that, when it grows.... it gets really long. I mean, really long. And for some strange reason, Henry grew bangs faster than anything else. He had what some ladies liked to call "the reverse mullet". He lost & shortened the hair on the back of his head a bit, as most babies do from turning their heads back and forth while lying on their backs. But those bangs? Ohhh those bangs were relentless.

I'm gonna be honest here and say that Henry is a pretty boy. My husband detests that phrase, especially when used to describe either of our sons. But it's the truth where Henry is concerned. He is pretty. He has his Daddy's long lashes, a chubby dimply smile (we still aren't sure where the dimples came from), super round rosey cheeks, and of course.... that hair! So I shouldn't have been offended when 90% of people thought he was a girl, but I totally was.

I subscribe to the idea that if you want people to know what your baby is (because, come on, sometimes it's hard)... you should dress them in gender specific clothing. Go ahead and wah-wah about gender profiling and crap (I'm sorry, if you leave your family and friends in the dark about your child's sex until "it" reaches kindergarten, that is weird), I personally think you're doing your child a social disservice. Starting them out with social norms and letting them become who they are, are two totally different things. And maybe it sucks that there are "social norms" in the first place, but it is what it is, folks. /rant. Naturally, I dress my children in blues and greens and browns... sometimes grey or black or white (which aren't gender specific, but it's not like they're dresses). I completely avoid pink, purple, and the less obvious yellows and creams - because if you go with those "gender neutral" colors, their guess is going to be 50/50, and when dealing with a pretty boy - it's not an option. Heck, my oldest son wasn't a "pretty boy"...he was much more of a chubby brute, and one day when we were lounging around the house in PJs (him in a yellow duck sleeper) we answered the door to an annoying salesperson who thought he was a girl.  I have since thrown out, sold, traded, donated, or given away anything yellow.

SO... when I make a point to symbolically say, "Hey, nosy person, yes... my son's hair is a bit out of control but do you see his BLUE outfit with the construction equipment on it? He's obviously a boy".... I'm rather annoyed when people say, "ohh, she's sooo cute!".

Henry's hair reached "out of control" status when he was about 3.5 months old, and I'm sorry...but to me, that is too soon for a hair cut. He was only just able to hold his own head up! You try trimming hair on someone with a rubber neck! He's 6 months old now, but even that felt too soon... Luke didn't have his first hair cut until after his 1st birthday.... 6 months seemed a little ridiculous.

Until last weekend. I went out to lunch with my boys and my mom, and an older woman who had no business wearing head-to-toe hot pink (but was) decided to comment relentlessly on how cute my little girl was. She was saying it all to herself and her obviously annoyed lunch companion, and not to me (though loud enough that you could tell she wanted me to hear), so there were no opportunities for me to say "HIS name is Henry" or "Yeah, he's a handsome one!". I just had to kind of ignore her loud personal commentary and fail miserably at it.

"Ooooh, look at how cute she is! Aw, look at her little dimples when she smiles! She has such beautiful eyes! She's so lucky to have a big brother to look out for her!"

All true, except for the fact that I don't have a daughter. That was the last straw. Officially sick of it. Despite having zero hair cutting talent, I relieved Henry of his bangs. I dislike the way it sits on his head, because clearly - I didn't know what I was doing. But when I muss it up a little bit, I have to admit... he's kind of adorable with short hair. In that... chubby brute kinda way his older brother always was.

Let's hope this ends the feminine commentary. And that he never learns of this. Unless of course he grows up to be gay, in which case I will proudly tell him this, like... "see, apparently the world just knew it!"


No comments:

Post a Comment