I cried Uncle days ago and it's still beating me over the head and giggling while I scowl and try to make it clear how unamused I am. Last week I shared an update about how things were going pretty well in the exercise department, and had a discussion about excuses that was basically me saying..."when is it okay for me to say this isn't working?" while also saying, don't give up. I've been trying so hard, and getting knocked down over and over. And even after having mostly positive things to say so recently, I've just......fallen apart since then.
I've figured it out, though. I know the reason why goals and resolutions (particularly health ones) don't last very far into the year. And I can tell you the secret in one word!
The problem with January is that it's winter. (Although, I don't know what's up with your Floridians if you're giving up on your goals so quickly. If it were me, it would probably because my life would be figuring out how many times I could go to Disney without going bankrupt.) You start out with this inspired motivation because of the fresh new year and talk of goals, and maybe getting some shinny new things for Christmas that will help you do all of the things you're aspiring to do energizes you, but then you're dragged down from that high in a week or two.
For me, the reasons why are three-fold.
I know that diets aren't all (and shouldn't be) about salads morning noon and night, but any truly healthy diet or program encourages lots of fruit and veggies and leafy green nonsense with refreshing things like balsamic vinegar and swimming pool's worth of ice water.
Who wants to eat that when it's ten degrees out and your extremities are numb? The only things my body is asking for are coffee, tea, chili, carbs, cookies, more carbs, biscuits, and a side of carbs. I try so hard to control myself, but when you're gagging at the thought of choking down something cold and refreshing when you're three blankets deep and shivering, how do you keep at it every single day? It was hard enough to drag myself out of a warm bed to workout, but I was doing it, and then sabotaging it by not at all caring about the contents of whatever warm thing I could get my hands on.
We were pretty lucky with germs at the start of this school year, but January has been absolutely demolishing us since them. As soon as we recover from something, another thing attacks. This is the peak of cold & flu season, and my family has the most opportunity to come into contact with germs this month. I keep having to reset my progress either because of being sick myself, or having to care for a sick kid for days, and I am so, so tired of having to start over because of things that are out of my control. If it was my own laziness at least I could say, "stop being stupid!" But every time I pick up steam, germs take the wind out of my sails again.
The first part of this is that Luke, my oldest son, has his birthday three weeks after Christmas. I always forget about preparing for his birthday while I'm busy with the holidays, so every year I'm scrambling to put a party and celebrations and yadda yadda together. Not to mention coordinating gifts and such again after we just barely finished putting Christmas to bed.
But the worst part is that like 4 or 5 of his close friends were born in January. This not only means that I have to coordinate with a whole bunch of distant acquaintances about birthday party plans, but we have to shop for and attend an unGodly amount of kid birthday parties this month. PS, it's January, and what the heck are you gonna do with 10 or 15 seven year old boys? Bring them all to germy kids party venues, of course. We have been to every slimy, germ-infested bouncey-arcadey place in the area in the course of three weeks. You guys - THE GERMS.
So here I am. You win, January.
I haven't worked out in 4 or 5 days. My sugar intake has been obscene. I haven't meal planned or grocery shopped in at least ten days, maybe more, because I've been too busy with birthday parties and sick kids and trying (and failing) to keep my house in order amidst the chaos. I just can't swing it anymore - I feel like I've hit my tolerance limit, and I'm sick of feeling guilt over not doing what I set out to do even though a lot of the reasons why I'm not are out of my control. Could I be dragging myself out of bed at 5:30am and crossing things off my list to make stuff happen? Sure. But we already determined that wasn't going so well for me, and I could really use the rest with all of this germ nonsense.
The good news is, there's less than a week left of this horrible, awful, ridiculous month, and tomorrow we start chatting about goals for February that have NOTHING to do with health. We'll come back to this in June, when we're all cheering "yay, salad!" and until then - stay warm, and don't apologize.