It's 11:27pm, and here I am. Mistake #1. I rarely stay up this late, and usually regret it when my kids wake me up before the sun.
Mistakes #2 & #3 were that I almost spent too much time coming up with a blog name and design, because I'm a chronic blogger and can't help myself.
But those are all forgivable things. Because:
1) Always write, always start, always take notes when inspiration bites you.
2) No one (or next to know one) is meant to see this blog, and though I usually start out with the same intentions and end up pimping it anyway - I mean it this time. I want some privacy. I want some candor. I want - something more, and I'm taking it, and I'm not sure where this is all really going, anyway.
3) If YOU, silent reader or stealthy stalker, giggle at my punny name (might as well complete the branding circle), I don't care. It's full of corn and cheese. Poke all you like,
I get really grossed out and eye-rolly about a lot of things these days, especially with people who are promoting the same idea. When I've heard something before, and then I see someone else talk about it as if they've invented the same wheel, I'm all...."here we go again." So even though my first thought was - cheeseball central - I was feeling overly motivated and hopeful and seeing the words "design your life" on a diety-motivational-selfieobsessed-JillianMichaels-clone blog did something to me.
The fact stood that I landed on that blog for a reason. I was Pinteresting (the new word for Googling) for recipes while I meal planned after my kids were in bed - seeking healthy, won't-take-me-four-hours meals to work into my life that week. Improving my health has been on my radar, and yet ignored, for far too long. I try my booty off to make changes and set guidelines for myself, and I'm proud of some of the things I've done. But the fact remains - when I make the rules, they're extremely easy to bend. And I'm not quite getting where I want to be fast enough.
So I look, and try, and nudge, and over-indulge (because I did this special but really actually mundane thing!), and eventually totally give up and say.....screw that, yo. Starbucks lattes with heavy cream, chocolate chip cookies every weekend, CHOCOLATE PANDA PAWS ICE CREAM EVERY NIGHT! Because life is short, and chocolate.
And slowly but surely....there I am, searching again.
Knowing there's more, there's better. Wanting a better, longer, more fulfilled future. Wanting more confidence in the fact that I'm living as vividly as I should.
It occurred to me that I needed some sort of balance. That I needed to make time for change - to allow habits and practices time to make a difference. And also that I needed both control to sculpt my life, and instruction along the way.
The idea of designing my life was so thrilling, because I realized I could really define what that means.
It means that even now, as a Mom deeply in the throes of motherhood, I can claim a lifestyle and personal improvements of my own. Which sounds like a simple, obvious thought - but, I don't know, almost 7 years of being at home and committing your life to other people messes with your perception, I suppose.
It means that I can look into every little aspect of my life, and improve on it - make it happier, deeper, sweeter.
I've overcome a lot in the last few years - illnesses, depression, fears, overwhelming stress - sometimes to the point of feeling totally out of control. And instead of just surviving everything that life throws at me and navigating what the world around me dictates, it's time to define my life within that world.
And that is what Enrychment is. It's me, being punny with my last name, and working my sweet, sweet booty off - doing hard, scary, intense, amazing, focused, and enlightening things.